What happens in Vegas is supposed to stay in Vegas, but that’s not always the case if you suspect your spouse or significant other of being unfaithful during business travel. Unfortunately, infidelity occurs more than you think while men and women are traveling on business – it’s an opportunity for unfaithfulness, away from prying eyes, with less chance of being caught.
Those who work in the travel industry have some revealing revelations about business travelers. Cindy, a former bellhop at an Austin, Texas, hotel, revealed that she was stunned at how often men asked her to set them up with a hooker while staying at her hotel. Infidelity can occur anywhere and at any time, but business travel gives men and women a unique opportunity to do so without the risk of getting caught.
The statistics can be questionable depending on your sources (because who wants to admit to cheating when answering survey questions?), but as Psychology Today reports, the general consensus is that between 10-13% of traveling spouses may be unfaithful to their husband or wife. Not a huge percentage…unless you are married to one of these traveling guys or gals! If you suspect your spouse is being unfaithful while on the road, here are a few things to watch out for.
First, monitoring your bank account and credit cards for affair-related charges will probably not give you any clues to his or her out-of-town behavior. Any charges related to the affair can be hidden or written off as business expenses, making it harder for you to see any suspicious charges or activity. You may have to look into alternative methods of checking up on your spouse, such as hiring a private investigator to physically follow him or her or calling your spouse’s home office to find out the details of his or her travels – sometimes unfaithful spouses will tack on an extra day or two to spend with their lover, or they may not be staying at the company’s preferred hotel because they are staying with someone else. The home office should definitely know how to get hold of them if you can’t.
Here’s some good advice whether you suspect infidelity or not: stay in touch as much as possible while your spouse is traveling. And note that business travel in itself does not spur unfaithfulness, as this Forbes review illustrates. The reasons for infidelity on the road are just the same as for those who stay home: personal or relationship issues. Always be working on your relationship even when you are apart from each other.
In this day and age of virtual everything, there are many tools at your disposal to stay connected to your spouse even at long distances. Utilize Skype, FaceTime, video calls, texting, email and the like, to stay in touch with your spouse. Know the different time zones and when the best possible times to communicate are. Make sure your spouse knows that you are doing everything you can to stay in touch, so they are not tempted by one-night stands or long-distance affairs.
If it’s possible, tag along with your traveling partner whenever you can! Oftentimes when you accompany your spouse on a business trip, you will discover that it’s not as exotic or romantic or exciting as you think it is. Endless meetings, answering calls and emails, working most of the day in a different city and environment, and eating hotel food in front of the TV can often lead a worker to do nothing more than fall into their hotel bed at night…alone. Tagging along gives you a chance to see what your spouse experiences when traveling for business. You may even have an opportunity for some sightseeing or a cozy dinner for two at times. Either way, it’s good to know what your spouse’s day consists of while you are back at home base.
If your spouse travels internationally, be sure to discuss the cultural implications of where they are going. In some countries such as China and other Asian nations, there may be cultural expectations, for example, everyone is expected to partake in alcohol as part of the business process itself (some cultures or foreign businesses will even offer to find you a companion for the evening as part of the work environment). Talk about what you and your spouse consider acceptable behavior on these business outings (moderation is always the wisest choice). Find out together what the most appropriate way to turn down any requests that your spouse isn’t comfortable with. Make sure your spouse is aware of any of these types of cultural expectations and discuss the best way to handle them before he or she gets on an airplane.
Regardless of how hard you personally try to find out if your spouse is cheating, sometimes the only sure way to find out is to hire a professional private investigator. A private eye is just about the only way you can catch a traveling cheater because they can conduct surveillance to watch who exactly is coming and going in your spouse’s hotel room. “It’s surprising how many spouses will cheat while traveling,” says New York private investigator Darrin Giglio. “It tells you that the fear of getting caught is the only thing keeping some people from cheating.”